Thursday, April 05, 2007

Summer interns, but it ain't summer for me

Some guys are born lucky. Or atleast they have some real nice connection with HR folks. And I am not too amused about it.

Guys at HR send a promising mail to offer you summer interns, who are nothing but workhorses that will slog during the toughest months of the year, think that they are making a real decent contribution through the project and use all kind of tools that you studied when going around with Kotler was fashionable. And at the end give a summary that you knew anyway. But Corporate responsibility demands that we entertain these interns, walking a very thin line between sadism and CR.

But that’s where my issue starts. I also ask for some interns. Afterall who doesn’t want workhorses and a reassurance of what you thought as a hunch is right?! And then I get them. But, if I find the guy who does the matchmaking, I will lynch him.

Firstly, they send all the good-looking kids to people with very little gray matter. I tried offering a fairly decent bribe to siphon a few my side, but nothing seems to work or these HR guys have a mistaken notion that I am gay. They send two boys. And my neighbors would have the cute kids. I don’t know what the cute kids do, but having embarked upon the noble cause of CR, I need some motivation, don’t I? These sadists atleast should maintain some parity and send the cute kids to the other block, but they kinda irritate you by sending them to your neighbor. Absolutely no sense of internal corporate responsibility! They not only screw up my motivation but also screw up the cause of the organization, because I know I am not gay and am not gonna spend time with these boys giving gyan. Let them come up the hard way buddy, that’s what I did in life.

Second, my project was to analyze consumer behavior and the boy is doing that paper next year. Voila, he is not even going to use the tools now. You then teach them the core subject, your need and expect him to come and reassure you. Some project it is!! Guess it is written on my face that I am a fool, as the original guy allotted to me brings another one, asking for guidance whereas his real mentor is relaxing. He innocently claims that I can guide him better.

And the boys are leechier than the girls. I almost get a feeling that I am pregnant because these kids are hanging around me all the time. And I am sure to have morning sickness and not come to office one day.

It happens with the MT’s also. The cuter girls always get allotted to some jerk and you get to mentor the unwanted. Guess they book them at the campus itself. This time around, come what may I will even cancel my annual holiday, but go on the campus interviews and book a couple for myself too.

I say all this, but me being the nice guy I am, always do more to the cause of the organization by treating these kids so hard that when they come on rolls, they feel that the job is a honeymoon and do well. Afterall I have some responsibility too.

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