One of the biggest problems with men seems to be the constant efforts that they take to woo women. Irrespective of their age and the women’s age! I am not generalizing here. I am very very certain about what I say. Kushwant Singh cites one of the three most obnoxious habits of Indian men is ‘name dropping’. He talks more about people who peddle favors by dropping names. And I include name dropping of a different kind.
I have seen many an intelligent man, who has a wide spectrum of knowledge. Be it music, literature, theater, history, sarcastic wit, academics, gift of the gab, writing, you name it, they are there. But the biggest issue is that you will never get to know it if you are a male yourself. All these are reserved skills and knowledge. Applicable only if your anatomy is different from theirs. Highly respectable otherwise, they would not waste a chance to display their array of awareness, and you get lucky only if you don’t mind wearing a sari.
What is it with these men? In fact when I listed out the knowledge set, I was wondering I may qualify too. But despite my self-deprecating writing tendency and a penchant for flirting, I am unable to include myself in that list. I have never once used Somerset Maugham to get me a female listener. Of course I have ended up discussing a few of these names, but that’s when I realized that they do share the passion on specific areas of my interest. And it makes a good conversation. And obviously I don’t dig more of Maugham the next day and keep asking them whether they read this book or that book. I may have even ended up trading books, but never once called to find out whether they read that and what they liked about it.
But this breed is different. Maybe they read the dictionary for a pastime and choose 10 words for the day and then create situations that will warrant usage of these words. I had this friend of mine who carried a Financial Management book when he came home for a coffee. That joker could have left it in the car. His idea was to make me know that he reads that book. Now that is something. Firstly I am not a female. Second, I would probably laugh at people who read a FM book even if the next day is a semester exam. You don’t read such books!
That clown was an exception. Maybe he had some aspiration desires and he tried to impress me with that book. But the clan that I talk about will never display this intelligence anywhere else, but if a chance occurs they will pound the females, non stop with their awareness levels. I probably want to call them Googlies. Quite an apt name, guys who would Google any information on earth just to parade their gray cells and the intentions anyway is the wrong way. I feel it is an insult to do this intellectual strip tease. Maybe they would not mind doing the real one if they pack six-pack abs. For them, they should be seen. But why not show everyone yaar?! Why reserve it only for the other gender? Do you think that men don’t deserve such honor? Or, are you afraid that you will have to endure the spectacle of an intellectual strip tease in return?
And who tells them that this is what woos women? I have heard of guys who will see palms and palm themselves off in the bargain. Should be world’s oldest trick as a dialogue opener I guess. I am certain that the women who are subjected to this are having a hearty laugh themselves and maybe compare notes. “Hey did that joker come to you and tell that you sing like Lata Mangeshkar”. And they know there are atleast a million Lata’s in the office space, if they happen to croon and look good also.
My friends luckily are the ones who don’t even get inspired by my beer drinking prowess. If I manage to adopt such techniques, they will straight tell me ‘Moodu’( meaning ‘close’, but in a very derogatory tone ). And the ones who really think I am intelligent are the ones who are intelligent themselves, so they can see through it, if it is a part of a mating dance. So, I don’t attempt such daredevilry. More often than not, it pays to tell what runs in your mind, rather than enlisting the services of Gabriel García Márquez's ‘One Hundred Years of Solitude’. Primarily because I haven’t read that book! And the ones that I read like Penthouse Letters are not quotable even if it is a wild woman. And after all this, any which way I am accused of being a scene stealer. One thing I always did was, I kept these tools and flirting separated. Never had followed up the next day on what was an ice-breaker the previous day. I thought long and hard whether it was a unique strategy employed by me, but at the end of it gave myself the benefit of doubt. Whatever I did was an adult transaction and that I think is an honest behavior.
The ‘forward kings’ (because they first forward the mails they receive to a set of girls and then only read it themselves) are actually backward in nature. So I would rather wait and get those forward’s from the very same girls. These are very adolescent characteristics. Amateur psychology, Amateur astrology, Listening to English songs for the heck of it and parading those are all samples of such traits! If one is carrying these well into their adulthood, one would make a fool of himself.
And the worst insult is that women don’t even attempt such stuff. They are supremely confident that any which way we will do all the hard work, or they simply think that men aren’t worth the effort. And we constantly prove them right! Or, they think that all these attempts are not needed because, as I read somewhere men think with some other apparatus other than brain. Shame on you Brother!
I may sound patronizing and also appear painting myself as above all these, which I am not. As a fellow member of the clan, I have one piece of advice for you. Look for the new John Miller advertisement. There is enough space in this earth for Good Looking Rascals. Maybe I will change it a wee bit. There is space for Honest Rascals.
Be one!
I have seen many an intelligent man, who has a wide spectrum of knowledge. Be it music, literature, theater, history, sarcastic wit, academics, gift of the gab, writing, you name it, they are there. But the biggest issue is that you will never get to know it if you are a male yourself. All these are reserved skills and knowledge. Applicable only if your anatomy is different from theirs. Highly respectable otherwise, they would not waste a chance to display their array of awareness, and you get lucky only if you don’t mind wearing a sari.
What is it with these men? In fact when I listed out the knowledge set, I was wondering I may qualify too. But despite my self-deprecating writing tendency and a penchant for flirting, I am unable to include myself in that list. I have never once used Somerset Maugham to get me a female listener. Of course I have ended up discussing a few of these names, but that’s when I realized that they do share the passion on specific areas of my interest. And it makes a good conversation. And obviously I don’t dig more of Maugham the next day and keep asking them whether they read this book or that book. I may have even ended up trading books, but never once called to find out whether they read that and what they liked about it.
But this breed is different. Maybe they read the dictionary for a pastime and choose 10 words for the day and then create situations that will warrant usage of these words. I had this friend of mine who carried a Financial Management book when he came home for a coffee. That joker could have left it in the car. His idea was to make me know that he reads that book. Now that is something. Firstly I am not a female. Second, I would probably laugh at people who read a FM book even if the next day is a semester exam. You don’t read such books!
That clown was an exception. Maybe he had some aspiration desires and he tried to impress me with that book. But the clan that I talk about will never display this intelligence anywhere else, but if a chance occurs they will pound the females, non stop with their awareness levels. I probably want to call them Googlies. Quite an apt name, guys who would Google any information on earth just to parade their gray cells and the intentions anyway is the wrong way. I feel it is an insult to do this intellectual strip tease. Maybe they would not mind doing the real one if they pack six-pack abs. For them, they should be seen. But why not show everyone yaar?! Why reserve it only for the other gender? Do you think that men don’t deserve such honor? Or, are you afraid that you will have to endure the spectacle of an intellectual strip tease in return?
And who tells them that this is what woos women? I have heard of guys who will see palms and palm themselves off in the bargain. Should be world’s oldest trick as a dialogue opener I guess. I am certain that the women who are subjected to this are having a hearty laugh themselves and maybe compare notes. “Hey did that joker come to you and tell that you sing like Lata Mangeshkar”. And they know there are atleast a million Lata’s in the office space, if they happen to croon and look good also.
My friends luckily are the ones who don’t even get inspired by my beer drinking prowess. If I manage to adopt such techniques, they will straight tell me ‘Moodu’( meaning ‘close’, but in a very derogatory tone ). And the ones who really think I am intelligent are the ones who are intelligent themselves, so they can see through it, if it is a part of a mating dance. So, I don’t attempt such daredevilry. More often than not, it pays to tell what runs in your mind, rather than enlisting the services of Gabriel García Márquez's ‘One Hundred Years of Solitude’. Primarily because I haven’t read that book! And the ones that I read like Penthouse Letters are not quotable even if it is a wild woman. And after all this, any which way I am accused of being a scene stealer. One thing I always did was, I kept these tools and flirting separated. Never had followed up the next day on what was an ice-breaker the previous day. I thought long and hard whether it was a unique strategy employed by me, but at the end of it gave myself the benefit of doubt. Whatever I did was an adult transaction and that I think is an honest behavior.
The ‘forward kings’ (because they first forward the mails they receive to a set of girls and then only read it themselves) are actually backward in nature. So I would rather wait and get those forward’s from the very same girls. These are very adolescent characteristics. Amateur psychology, Amateur astrology, Listening to English songs for the heck of it and parading those are all samples of such traits! If one is carrying these well into their adulthood, one would make a fool of himself.
And the worst insult is that women don’t even attempt such stuff. They are supremely confident that any which way we will do all the hard work, or they simply think that men aren’t worth the effort. And we constantly prove them right! Or, they think that all these attempts are not needed because, as I read somewhere men think with some other apparatus other than brain. Shame on you Brother!
I may sound patronizing and also appear painting myself as above all these, which I am not. As a fellow member of the clan, I have one piece of advice for you. Look for the new John Miller advertisement. There is enough space in this earth for Good Looking Rascals. Maybe I will change it a wee bit. There is space for Honest Rascals.
Be one!
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